The Ferrett, that is.
Personally, I want the next con to make available a supply of buttons reading "Only if you want your nuts twisted off". They'd be obtainable in red or green, as per the wearer's preference...
"[Granny] was opposed to books on strict moral grounds, since she had heard that many of them were written by dead people and therefore it stood to reason reading them would be as bad as necromancy."
- Terry Pratchett, Equal Rites